Chapter 1: Introduction and personal story
thank you so much Pastor Matthew it's such a privilege to be here I I had planned on being here last year at in in was it September I think or August it was I think it was September end of August beginning of September and I received some pretty rough news I was diagnosed with stage four stomach cancer last August and so I had to cancel and I said when I get back to preaching friends will be first on the list and so I I said hey I've got you know some time between radiation and and my next scan and can I come back out and they were very gracious to to let me come back so I'm I'm privileged to be here it really is an honor every single moment every single breath every single step is is a privilege and an honor and a blessing and a miracle from God I'm more keenly aware of that than ever before so let's invite him to come I got I want to share some of my story with you but God my my my heart today is just to get God God here in our hearts in our minds consuming us that's really what I'm what I pray for but that can't happen unless he wants to do it so let's pray and ask him to come God you have said that when We Gather in your name there shall you also be you said that when we come together in agreement it shall be done for us Lord I know that I have brothers and sisters here who are not here to just hear someone speak but rather here to encounter for you God at least I hope that's what they're here for and so I pray Lord in agreement with my brothers and sisters that we want you God come Lord Jesus Come into our hearts come into our minds transform Us in this next 35 minutes or so Lord I pray that you would come and that we would hear from you God if you want to speak through me great if you'd rather just come and speak directly in people's hearts even better Lord but one way or the other I pray that we would encounter you in such a way that we would not leave here unchanged but go from here just as Moses went face transformed because he had seen you God I pray that we would go from here transformed having seen you so come Lord For Your Glory we pray in Jesus name amen sometime I pray with my eyes closed and I always feel like I'm about to walk off a stage and sermon is going to be over real quick if that happens well give you a little bit of background on my life my father is from Pakistan my
Chapter 2: Growing up in a Muslim family
mother as well I'm first generation us I was raised in a loving Muslim family my father came from Pakistan in the 70s he actually landed here in this country the day that Elvis died yeah it's tragic some of you are like he's not dead I saw him in Vegas he he landed the day that Elvis died and my dad gets off the plane he sees a newspaper the newspaper reads the king is dead my dad's like I could have sworn this was a democracy so that's how he comes here bright-eyed bushy tail tail end of of Vietnam and so the the US government still looking for recruits to join the military my father joins the Navy he gets shipped out goes to Okinawa he's working as a medic out there and sewing people up ultimately works his way up the enlisted ranks switches to the officer ranks and after 24 years of serving the Navy retired as a lieutenant commander so thanks so I grew up seeing my father going out to see and and seeing him defend this country and him telling me to Bill it's because this country gives us the freedom to worship that we have an obligation to fight and defend it if if if we're called out to war we have to go we have to be good American citizens that's how I understood my duty as a young Muslim in the United States and and when 2001 happened when the buildings came down the Islamic community around us was just as shocked as everybody else in the country and and I remember for us we were just as vulnerable in that moment hurting just as much as everybody else my sister actually loves New York City she has a poster of New York City in her room at this time and the Twin Towers where we had just visited them a few years prior and so we love New York we love this country and and we're seeing the towers come down we're feeling just as vulnerable as everybody else but then people turn their eyes towards Muslims and they're thinking who are you can we trust you what what's your agenda here and we didn't just have to deal with the same thing everybody else was dealing with then we had to sort of defend ourselves too and in the midst of this we're like no we're we're American my dad I remember we went out to Home Depot and bought every single American flag we could and we just put it on our cars and on our Lawns and I mean it was we're just trying to signal to people we are American too but we kind of got caught in the crosshairs there and in the midst of that time people are questioning us and literally questioning us like what does your religion teach and I had been taught my whole childhood that Islam is a religion of peace and and and that's that was the the slogan that that we had used and that's what we actually truly believed but in that time you know the thing about I was a freshman in college at that time the thing about being in college is that the way it should be anyway is that people can push you and challenge you and test you and so people are beginning to ask questions nail of Islam is a religion of Peace how do you explain what they're doing on the TV screens how do you explain that they're killing people in the name in the name of Allah and these were questions that were very very important to me but but for me growing up you have to understand Islam was peaceful and I was an American and a Muslim those two were not exclusive of one another my mom my dad actually after he was in the Navy for a few years his first real vacation he got he went to Pakistan and he had his marriage it was an arranged marriage with my mother and she was the daughter of a Muslim missionary so I don't know if you know this but Muslims send out missionaries as well and my grandfather spent his
Chapter 3: Muslim faith and American life
life preaching Islam in the jungles of Indonesia so my mom was born in Borneo and her father was out preaching and her mom was trying to make some money to take care of the family so my mom was left to raise the younger siblings and to raise them in the way of Islam and so she had spent years already raising her siblings teaching them the Islamic way so by the time I was born you can imagine how much devotion she had to the faith the daughter of a missionary the granddaughter of a missionary having already raised kids and and so she raised us to be good devout Muslims so what does that mean well that means praying five times a day that means first thing in the morning reciting Traditions that Muhammad used to recite thanking God for giving us life every single day that's how I prayed first thing in the morning I would pray a prayer in Arabic alhamdulillah had no clue what it meant but As I Grew Older my mom taught me Nial this is why you recite this every day this prayer means all praise be to God who gives me life causes me to die and will raise me up again anticipating the day of judgment that all Muslims believe in but also every single day saying thank you God for waking me up this morning that's how I would start my day and then I would do the ceremonial Washings and I'd go down to the prayer rugs and I would pray the first of the five daily prayers constantly in remembrance of our faith and thanking God for sustenance and asking him to be with me reciting portions of the quranic scripture in order to to be performing my duties but also to please God because that is something that's a part of Islam is that you earn your blessings by pleasing God and fulfilling your obligations and your duties and at the end of time According to Islamic theology if you've done more Good Deeds than bad you will go to heaven and if you've done more bad Deeds than good you'll go to hell though though God can work some Grace in there too that's basically how I saw the world and so by the age of five I had seven chapters of the Quran memorized the reason why is because I would stand next to my father every day during the five daily prayers and during portions of the prayers my dad would recite from memory portions of the Quran and so if you hear scripture recited every day and your family makes a habit of memorizing it you're going to memorize it you're going to have it even by the age of five you'll have whole chapters memorized and so that's that's what I had I'd also recited the entire Quran in Arabic by the age of five just it was a duty my parents wanted me to do it by the age of five before I turned six and so I did it kids are able to do a lot more than we might give them credit for U but the the the point is that we have to model it for them and and and to show them how to do it and so my mom was excellent at doing that and she taught me na as you go out to school you have to remember that you are an ambassador for Islam when people see your face they're going to see Muslim so it doesn't matter if you are the best student in your class it doesn't matter if you're even the president of the United States when people see your face they are going to associate that with Islam and so you need to be the most respectful person in your classroom you need to have the greatest Integrity the best morals you can't you can't lie you can't cheat you can't of course you can't drink or do any drugs or hang out with girls or none of that you have to be treating your teachers as if they were your parents with that much respect and so that was the attit that my mom raised me with I'm representing Islam this is my faith and so I would go to school with with a great degree of of Pride to to be a representative of my faith and and I kind of expected everyone else to be doing the same thing I if you don't understand the way immigrants see the world imagine if you were going to just move to let's say turkey you have some preconceived notions of what turkey is and if you got there and nobody from the country actually welcomed you in and told you hey that we aren't actually like that we're like this you would perpetuate in your preconceived notions and your prejudices you would just continue that way well my mom when she came to the US no American definitely no Christian ever received her into into their home to this day no Christian has invited my mom into her home except for my friends but that doesn't count no one
Chapter 4: Challenges to Christianity
in her community has ever reached out invited her they see the borka and all of a sudden they get afraid and so my mom has not had had the opportunity to see what real Christian Life is Like instead what she's told is that America is a Christian Nation then she looks at the TV and sees all the crazy stuff happening on Hollywood and all the stuff happening in celebrities lives and she hears what's happening in the news and the murders and the rapes and all this and that and she says this is a Christian Nation this is what Christianity is all about you if people would just Reach Out perhaps we'd be able to take care of of that but we don't unfortunately so for 30 plus years my mom has been here and no one in the community has just invited her to say this is what it's actually like and so she wants to train me as a young Muslim not just to be a good Muslim but to also not get affected by Christianity to not to not be tainted by that and so from a very young age she would teach me how to respond to Christianity she gave me books to read to say this is why Christianity is false you know what sense does it make to say that a man died on a cross for your sins how does that even work what sense does it make to say that God is three in one what sense does it make to say that the Bible is reliable when we've seen all these issues with it I was reading these books from childhood and so when people were coming to me and it very rarely happened but when people came to me to share the gospel with me I was trained with a response to give to them so that they would be turned around in fact there was a very specific time that I recall in high school and my friend Betsy came to me and she said Nabil do you know Jesus my response to her was yes I know Jesus the Quran teaches me all about Jesus it teaches me that Jesus is Virgin born that he's the most miraculous man who ever Liv that he's able to cleanse lepers and heal the Blind and raise the Dead the Quran teaches me that Jesus is in fact the sinless Messiah and and and his return is is going to be in the latter days the Quran teaches me all this I know Jesus and she apparently didn't know that she didn't know what to say next so I continued for her and I said but I also know Betsy that Jesus is not God and she says no Neal that's the most important part Jesus Is God and I said really do you actually believe that because I've looked through the gospels and I don't know anywhere he claims to be god let's let's assume for the sake of this conversation Betsy that Jesus that the that the Bible is reliable I think it's been changed I don't think is trustworthy but let's just say it hasn't been changed where does Jesus say he is God in the gospels and she thought about it and she said well doesn't Jesus say the father and I are one I say yeah but if I say I'm one with someone I'm not saying I am that person it means I'm United with them I'm unified with them in spirit that's why Jesus says that he prays for the disciples to be one just as he is one with the father he's not saying he's God you know if if you if you want to see what Jesus says about himself why not go to the gospel of Mark where Jesus is going through the towns and villages in Galilee and he could do no Miracles are you telling me God can't do Miracles what about in The Gospel of Luke where it says Jesus grew in wisdom and in stature how can God grow in wisdom and in stature and as I'm sharing these things with her I'm seeing her confidence wne because she hasn't thought about these things before and I saved the biggest one for last I said Betsy if you want to quote the Gospel of John why not go to that verse where Jesus says the father is greater than I I would believe Jesus if I were you God is greater than he is now if you want to know about Jesus ask me about Islam and I will share Islam with you and so I was able to take her evangelism her attempt at sharing the gospel and turn it around into my own daah my own invitation for her to accept Islam it was really easy to do because she hadn't thought about the evidence behind her faith the reasons for why she believed what she believed now don't get me wrong the moment she shared her faith with me my respect for her went through the roof because I knew what the gospel message was the Gospel message is unless you accept Christ you will go to hell at least that's how I understood it at the time it's a bit richer than that but that's how I understood it and so I knew hey there are all these Christians I see them going to church on Sundays they believe that you have to accept the gospel or otherwise I will go to hell why aren't they sharing the gospel with me and I could only come up with one of two reasons either they don't really believe it or they don't care if I go to hell like those are the only two things here and honestly I figured they don't really believe it I mean who who does believe this stuff I thought it was ridiculous and so that was my understanding of Christianity my respect for Betsy went through the roof when she shared the gospel with me but she hadn't studied the basics and every time I had a conversation with Christians asking these basic questions these aren't trick questions why do you believe Jesus Is God not a trick question it's an important one I realized that people simply hadn't thought about their faith and my conclusion ultimately was there must be no substance behind the Christian faith it's polytheism people want to worship Jesus but they also want to just say there's one God so they they call it the Trinity to make themselves feel better and they nobody can explain it that's just what it is so I saw it as my duty to share true monotheism with Christians who didn't realize they were polytheists that's that's how I felt and so I would share Islam with whoever would listen the first time I encountered a Christian who actually was prepared with answers to these kinds of questions was
Chapter 5: Meeting a Christian peer
in college his his name was David I met him on a debate tournament I had joined the debate team he had joined the debate team and we were going for our first tournament well when when we got to the hotel the rest of the team went out some of them had brought drugs with them some of them were looking to hook up for the night and do all kinds of stuff the team all went out to do their thing my mom had taught me hey don't do that kind of stuff be above that and so I stayed back there was one other guy on the team who said I don't want to be a part of that either and he stayed back and I thought okay well I can actually see eye to eye with this guy and so we ended up we had to split share rooms anyway so we ended up rooming together that night and as I'm putting my stuff away way he pulls out a Bible and starts reading I'm thinking no way this guy's a Christian this will be fun and so I looked at him and I said David you realize that book you're reading is not trustworthy and he closes the Bible and says go on so you guys are aware I missed it I was in the moment I was just going to take him down it's like David think about it didn't Jesus speak Aramaic but the earliest newest Testament was written in Greek and so by the time you actually have a recording of what Jesus said it's already gone through a translation but the Bible that lasted the longest period of time in church history was the Latin Bible and so it goes through another translation and then from Latin it went to German before it came to English so you had another translation of a translation so you've got a translation of a translation of a translation of a translation is what you're reading how do I know that I'm actually reading Jesus words when it's been translated so many times now I had used that challenge on Christians before but what I didn't know about David is that he had been raised in atheist five years prior he had seen his friend Randy reading a Bible and he had challenged Randy he said Randy do you know why you're reading a Bible because you were born in America had you been born in India you'd be reading the vdus had you been born in Arabia you'd be reading a Quran had you been born somewhere else you'd be reading something else because people like you just believe what you're taught to believe a bit condescending the irony is David was just saying that because he was raised atheist but whatever it's fine Randy systematically dismantles David's arguments he starts explaining to him why the scriptures are reliable why he trusts in the gospel starts giving him evidence for his faith over the course of the Year David slowly begins to realize that the Christian message is true and then he spends the next four years doing nothing but studying how to defend the gospel and then I walked into the room and in fact David had been praying all that morning he had been saying God there's a Muslim on the team if you want me to share the gospel with him just open the door and I just walked right through the door I was like hey I'm here and so David says nail earlier today I heard you speaking on the phone with your mom were you speaking in English I said no and he said but then I asked you what you talked about with your mom' and you told me in English was that a bad translation no he said Nabil you're multilingual you can take what you hear in one language and accurately translate that message into another language and so were the disciples whatever language Jesus was speaking yes he spoke Aramaic but he could have been speaking Greek whatever language he was speaking the disciples heard it wrote it down in Greek and we have in our possession today over 5,000 manuscripts of the New Testament in the original Greek nil we know with certainty what Jesus said I said David I think you're making this up I've talked to hundreds of Christians no one's told me this before he says you think I'm making this up I'm like yeah I think you're making this up he says well bring it I said it's been brought let's go and so for the rest of the night I just challenge him argument after argument I'm like what what do you mean Jesus died for the sins of man kind how does one man's death pay for everybody's sins what do you mean that God is a trinity how can three be one what do youan and I would just challenge him in all these basic principles of Christianity and for the first time someone had thought about it and was actually giving me responses that began to make sense although I wasn't done challenging it's not like I just believed him the moment he gave me a response so I challenged we pushed and pulled he started P pushing on Islam a bit and I started pushing back and so we're going back and forth by the end of the weekend we're nowhere near done with arguing so we decide to go back to our
Chapter 6: Investigating faith claims
University and sign sign up for courses so that we can sit in the back of the lecture hall and argue with one another and in the middle of that we end up doing projects together we end up doing homework together he starts coming to my house and my mom makes him buyani and kma and Roy and mne and then I go to his house and his Dad gives me beef jerky I was like okay that's fine whatever cool and so in the course of all this going to each other's house living life together we actually became best friends I realized that David was my best friend and if you have a message like the gospel and you're sharing that with the Muslim you're basically asking them to give up their lives you're asking them to give up everything if they don't know they can trust you they're not going to hear what you have to say relationships are critical for sharing the gospel I'm not saying street preaching doesn't work it does work I do it but that's not the primary Mode God has intended for us to reach the world it's through love relationships and so my friend David after sharing arguments with me over the course of a year it actually took a year to discuss the reliability of the New Testament I began to conclude hey this book is actually reliable there's there's no way that the New Testament because of the way it was written and proliferated there's no way anybody could have come and intentionally altered it such that it wouldn't have been caught I wish I had time to go into the details but there there is there was no method of external control over the scripture like that it proliferated much more organically and so I said okay the new testament's reliable but does that mean Christianity is true no it doesn't how do I know whether Christianity is actually true or not and so for the next few years we embarked on an investigation into the evidence of Christianity versus the evidence of Islam I was trying to convert him to Islam he's trying to convert me to Christianity and we would just share the arguments now you might be saying what what do you mean evidence for a faith don't you just pick a faith based on what appeals to you and I would say no there's so many different faiths out there you got Buddhism Hinduism Daoism you you've you've got of course Christianity Islam and Judaism The Big Three monotheistic faiths all these different faiths different faiths appeal to different people usually the faith you were raised in appeals to you more than every other Faith does but that doesn't make the faith true what makes a faith true and what makes it false interestingly the Christian message stands or falls on the resurrection of
Chapter 7: Historical evidence and the gospel
Jesus Paul says in 1 Corinthians 15 if Christ is not risen our faith is in vain and we're of all people most to be pied so did Jesus actually rise from the dead and very important for a Muslim as well is Jesus God did he claim to be God or not we find the two brought together in Romans chap 10:9 if you confess with your mouth some of you might know this verse if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead you will be saved Pastor Matthew they passed the Bible test if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead you will be saved okay Jesus Is God he died on the cross and he rose from the dead these three components actually form the gospel message I'm not sure if you've heard the gospel before but here's what it is in a nutshell God himself after having created us knew that we would rebel against him and in indeed we all rebel against him and the penalty for separating ourselves from God like that is death you might say why would God kill you for sin that doesn't that's that's a bit extreme no God doesn't kill you for sin when you sin you remove yourself from the source of life when you rebel against God you're looking at the source of life and saying I'm walking away from you and so you incur death for yourself God enters into this world dies on our behalf so that we don't have to die be separated from him and then he rises from the dead to prove that death has been defeated and to show us what will happen to us we will rise from the dead one day and be with him that's the gospel message and it's captured in Romans 10:9 if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead you will be saved but what I noticed about that when I was a Muslim trying to investigate whether Christianity or Islam is true is that these are three historical claims did a man named Jesus claim to be God did he then prove it by dying and rising from the dead does the evidence show that he died on the cross and does the evidence show he rose from the dead interestingly Islam denies all three of these points chapter 4: 157 of the Quran says he does not die he did not die on the cross 5: 72 of the Quran says he was not God he didn't claim to be God so when you establish the case for one you're actually Bringing Down the case for the other this is why when people say all religions teach the same thing I'm like that's an absurd statement these are diametrically opposed let me put it to you once again in another way in another way in Christianity you have to believe Jesus Is God to go to heaven in Islam if you believe Jesus Is God you're going to hell simp is that they can't be more diametrically opposed but when I studi the evidence when I studi the history and I'm talking about through a historical lens not reading the Bible and saying well the Bible says it therefore it's true not at all I didn't trust the Bible I'm reading the Bible the way a historian reads ancient texts and I came to the conclusion Jesus did die on the cross and he did the best explanation by far of what happened to him is that he rose from the dead and that he also claimed to be God by the way yeah
Chapter 8: Doubt and spiritual guidance
amen they're still on an Easter High I I'll take it so and by the way I have some books I've written on this if this is of interest to you this this is my heart story this is everything I've poured my life into is the evidence for Christianity and Islam and I wrote a book about that called no God but one and you can take a look at that if you'd like wherever fine books are sold and I looked at the case for and you know here's the thing that I want to get across to you we were told stories about Muhammad growing up about how amazing he is about how gracious he is about how merciful he is about how he's the best General the best Statesman the best Diplomat the best father the best husband we were told all these stories and that's why we had this love and passion for Islam in the west at least that was our impetus for loving our faith and for saying Islam is a religion of Peace but when I started investigating the evidence instead of just listening to stories I said what does history say and I went to the earliest books written about Muhammad's life and when you read those books you find horrific things that you've never been told before the stuff that Isis knows the stuff that alqaeda knows the Taliban they know this stuff we weren't taught this in the west and I'm studying the evidence and I'm thinking oh my goodness is this my prophet and so all of a sudden I had to deal with the cognitive dissonance of what is all this and the evidence the argumentation that I thought existed for Islam all crumbled at this at the moment of investigation and the more I studied the case for Christianity the more and more solid it became and so now I'm dealing with a real dilemma instead of just arguing with my friend now it's about my soul now it's about my life and about the world and so I ask God God can you show me what's true I've done as much as my mind can do I need you to show me what's true and Muslims often ask for guidance from God through visions and dreams particular particularly dreams and I did ask God for guidance through visions and dreams and he gave me a vision in three dreams don't have the time to get into the details with you right now but they led me to well they led me to the Cross but they also led me to scripture and I began to want to read what the Bible actually said here was the context in which that happened I was driving to school it was my my first day of second year of medical school so it was perhaps the most difficult academ year of my life and I'm instead of thinking okay this is I need to gear up for school I just can't get my mind out of the fact that wow everything I ever believed might be false everything my parents stood for might be false this Christian message as
Chapter 9: Conversion and inner conflict
crazy as it sounds might be true and so I can't get my mind out of that and I'm just literally crying as I'm going to school and I say God I know what I need to do you've given me all the evidence you've given me all the spiritual guidance through visions and dreams I know what I need to do but I need time to mourn I need time to mourn because for a Muslim to give up their Islamic life is to give up everything my mom had built her whole reputation her whole life's value was in serving the mosque and in preaching Islam she was the daughter and granddaughter of missionaries and in an honor and shame culture for your son to become a Christian your only son to become a Christian is worse than if if he had died and so can I do that to my mom it's not just it's a matter of me right I know my reputation is going to go down the tubes but forget that my mom and my dad who've done nothing but sacrificed everything they had for me can I do this to them and so you're wrestling with all this and I was just crying and I I said I said forget it I'm not going to school I went back to my apartment and I put the Bible in the Quran in front of me and I said God I need your comfort so I opened the Quran and I started looking for verses of comfort and for the first time I realized that there is not a single verse in the Quran designed to comfort a hurting man now there's verses that say if you repent God will forgive you and stuff like that but nothing that says the Lord is my shepherd I shall not want nothing that reaches the heart and so I put the Quran away I said this book doesn't apply to my life and I opened up the Bible and I said I don't know where to turn I know Christians read the New Testament so I'll go to Matthew chapter 1 saw it was a bunch of genealogy so I skipped it I was a Muslim I had an excuse skipped it didn't take me long to get to Matthew Chapter 5 and this is what it says blessed are those who mourn for they will be comforted and I thought this is exactly what I just prayed God put this verse in here for me I mean you guys can read it if you want but it's my verse I was like this is amazing and as I read it it was like it was electric and it jumped off the page and kickstarted my heart and I was like who is this God and I read the next verse it says blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness for they shall be satisfied and I'm thinking I hunger and thirst for righteousness I'm not righteous every time I try to be righteous I fall I sin but you're telling me just that I hunger and thirst for righteousness means I'm blessed what kind of God is this and I start reading through the scripture not trying to tear it down I always had but actually to receive what it had to say I encountered an unconditionally loving father and I thought this is amazing and I didn't want to miss a thing so I was reading every single footnote and I would ask God a question I'd be like God how do I know you're even hearing me right now and I'd read the footnote if you want to know God can hear you go to 1 John 3 thanks Boom 1 John 3 and I start reading and I'm going back and forth every single footnote it takes me a while to get from Matthew 5 to Matthew 10 but when I finally get to to Matthew 10 this is what I find he who proclaims me before the people of this world I will Proclaim before my Father in heaven and he who denies me before the people of this world I will deny before my Father in Heaven you see I had all the evidence the evidence was solid I had the spiritual guidance dreams and Visions I had the emotional guidance but I had not proclaimed because I knew it would cost me my family but as if God knew what I was thinking the next verse is say this he who loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me and I was thinking okay God I get
Chapter 10: The impact of conversion
it if I really love my parents I will Proclaim you to them because you are the truth but it's not just my parents it's my entire life the whole Islamic community all my friends everything that I've planned it's all going to go you know what the next verses say he who loses his life for my sake will find it Matthew 10 crazy convicting so I bowed my knee and I prayed well no one had told me about a sinner's prayer been with David for four years no one told me about a sinner's prayer but I prayed I gave my life to Christ in that moment and even though I ascented in that moment to the gospel I think I actually understood it a few days later when I had seen my father cry for the first time in my life when he found out what had happened he said these words to me Nabil today I feel as if my backbone has been ripped out from inside me you have to understand my dad is like this Pillar of Strength in my mind he's the warrior he goes out and fights for the country I'm the guy who made him cry and my mom if you had met her up until that moment she had always been full of life gregarious hospitable welcoming people in feeding them there was always a light shining in her eyes and in that moment it was as if I reached into her soul and turned that light off and she has never been the same and when they left I just crumbled to the ground and I just started crying I'm saying to God why didn't you kill me because I'm thinking in my mind if you had killed me the moment I believed I would have been in heaven I'd have been happy my parents wouldn't have known they'd have been happy I'd be worshiping you you'd be happy we'd all be happy if you'd killed me the moment I believed and so I'm rocking back and forth and saying why didn't you kill me why didn't you kill me and I don't know where your theology stands I'm just here to testify to what happened in my life as I'm saying why didn't you kill me why didn't you kill me I heard these words because this is not about you and it was like I was rooted to the ground I could not move for 10 minutes I was stuck in place and when I finally did get up and I walked away it was as if the person who had been there crying was somebody else and it was as if all the issues I had were somebody else's issues and I walked outside and I looked at the world and it all looked so different and I looked at a person crossing the street it's a fairly mundane thing someone crossing the street but for the first time it hit me that's not just someone that person is worth so much God died for them now you have to understand in the Muslim perspective God doesn't come into this world this world's too filthy God doesn't die for anyone why would God do that they're his servants he's God he's created the universe he's Majestic why would he do any he would never do any of that and the answer is he would because he loves them that much they're worth that much to him and the creator
Chapter 11: The depth of Christian love
of the universe the one who's worshiped By Angels for all eternity if you just saw one of those angels you'd be tempted to worship it that's how magnificent they are they're all worshiping him and he comes into this world for us to die for us what and and you have to think about the manner in which she came he comes as a baby born to two children who had just been accused of an illegitimate relationship right God could have come in on chariots and proclaimed himself King and whatever he could have been administered a lethal injection whatever like he he could have done this a lot easier if he wanted to but he comes in is born to two children who've been accused of an illegitimate relationship so his whole life he's carrying the ignominy of being an illegitimate child his father is a carpenter so he has to work with his hands and feet Blood Sweat and Tears In order to make ends meet until he gets to a point where he spends all his time investing in 12 men who he knows are going to betray him one of them betrays him with a kiss another one says I will die before I betray you and they all run away from him at his greatest moment of need then he's flogged I don't know if you know about the fogging process but we know about it through Roman history Cicero tells us that as people are flogged their skin is laid into ribbons and it starts falling off people's abdominal Walls Start breaking loose and intestines fall out during the flogging process arteries and veins are laid bare this is what some this was called the preath people di just by the fogging Our God goes through that and by the way they go through it naked they're not wearing any clothes through any of this we have to paint Jesus with clothes so we can take it he didn't he gets put on the cross broken and naked for everyone to ridicule the worst way to die ever devised in all of human history you have to ask yourself why why did he choose that death why did he choose that life and the answer is to show us the depths of his love for us if you were born in a family where the genealogy was broken where your parents had What was seen as an illegitimate relationship or if you have bared that your whole life you don't have that kind of Honor that a a lot of other people have or if you have been working with your hands to make ends meet to get paycheck to paycheck if you have poured your life into someone who betrayed you after having said that they would be with you till death if your body is broken and you're saying God why me this is not a God who stands back and judges you in the midst of all that this is a God who rolls up his sleeves and says I love you son I love you daughter I'm going to walk with you in this right next to you and does he just do that as a symbol of his love to show us how much he loves us more than that he tells us John chapter 15 as I have loved you so love one another he's telling us this is what love is this is what it means to follow me if you're going to follow me you have to love people the way I loved people you're asking me about people coming to this country immigrants coming to this country am I safe am I secure who cares if you're safe you have to be willing to die for your neighbor if you want to follow me while we were still sinners Christ died for us while we were yet his enemies Christ died for us he set the example for us look if we are in him we know we has eternity secured we are going to be in heaven forever that's the promise he has given us what that means is there are five billion people in this world who are worse off than we are every single one of them and we are here to be God's hands and feet Christ tells us this he says everything I have done you shall do and greater still he says what he does we're supposed to do it if your enemy is hungry give them something to eat if they're thirsty give them something to drink love them cuz I loved you when you were my enemy you call yourself a follower of mine do what I did that's what it means to be Christian look when we call ourselves Christian we've taken Christ's name Christian if we don't live how he lived we've taken his name in vain that's what it means to take the lord's name in vain and a lot of us do it all the time but I have better hope for us here I've seen this church I've seen the spirit moving I've met some of you and talked to some of you
Chapter 12: Cancer diagnosis and faith
I want to leave you with this 11 years to the day after I gave my life to Christ I was diagnosed with cancer stage four stomach cancer they call it terminal they said average lifespan is nine months and I fell on my face every single day after that diagnosis saying God don't take me away from my daughter my daughter's one-year-old don't take me away from my wife and then I went back to the gospels to study what I knew because I knew this was true I had done the investigation I had done the research God had spoken to me personally he gave me words I've encountered him I know he is real and I read through the gospels and here's what I find Jesus Is A Healer and he heals every single person who came to him for healing in the gospels now I'm not saying everyone who comes to him for healing today is healed but I am saying he healed everyone who came to him in the scriptures and the scriptures tell us he is the same yesterday today and forever and so I started looking to people who had seen God at work I said what's your story what's your story what's your story and I found out that God is alive even today working miracles even today my friend AJ in December his daughter died on the delivery table they wrote her time of death she had been without oxygen for 20 minutes death certificate written AJ come in say goodbye to your daughter AJ says I am not saying goodbye to my daughter he puts his hand on her and he says I say to you in the name of Jesus rise up and in front of the doctor in front of the nurse is their daughter started gasping and breathing and she's alive today I have a friend named Ken who lives here in La prayed for a woman who had been in a wheelchair with rheumatoid arthritis for over 40 years found out that she had been abused as a child and had never forgiven her abuser he said we need to work through this prayed with her for forgiveness worked with her after 45 minutes she walked out of that wheelchair here in La I have stories of friends who prayed for the blind their sight was restored these are people I know you might not believe me that's fine I know these people I'm here to tell you this is happening God is alive today and he's healing even stage four terminal stomach cancer so what I want to leave you with is this we serve an awesome God who who loves us who's made a way for us who heals us who is Our Father who is our friend and even if I have to go to him sooner than later I know my daughter will not be fatherless she has a heavenly father I know my wife will not be without a husband she is the bride of Christ I know there is a God Who Watches Over Us who's made a way for us and this life will be over in the blink of an eye I don't care who you are if you get killed by a car walking out of here now or if you die when you're 100 years old it will have been the blink of an eye and then our real life will start do you know where you will be when your real life starts and do you know the God who can Infuse real life into this life let's [Music] pray death where is your sting my God raises the dead he cleanses the lepers he heals the blind my God is able to overcome all evil he brings life and life to the full he took our infirmities and bore our diseases says Matthew 8:16 by his stripes we are healed says Isaiah 53 we have a God who
Chapter 13: Closing prayer and testimony
loves us who suffered for us and you God we Proclaim and we believe that you are our healer there are brothers and sisters who are in this room suffering today believing that they cannot be healed healed by what they have and I just say that that is a lie our God is able to do immeasurably more than all we could ask or imagine there are brothers and sisters in this room today who have prayed and prayed and prayed for breakthrough and they feel like giving up I feel like giving up but Luke 18 verse one says we are supposed to pray without seizing never giving up hope we have a God who raised himself from the dead so that we know we will be alive forever God thank thank you so much for this and I just pray now for those who are in this room who don't know you God how awesome you are how loving you are may they know you God it was my prayer at the beginning it's my prayer now God flood their hearts with your presence May every single person in this room have the joy of knowing you Jesus not just now but for eternity and as we go from here Lord may you put it on our hearts like a fire that cons consumes us that we spread your truth to every Muslim to every non-muslim to every single person who's a part from you regardless of their faith from their country of origin it doesn't matter you've created them all you do not desire that any should perish but all should have eternal life may we be a light and a beacon and a flame that takes this world Over For Your Glory in Jesus name [Music] amen would you do me a favor and would you thank na one more time for being here [Music] today you would do me a favor if nobody had move in this room I know you this service likes to get out of here but you're going to stay put really please this is the most important moment right now we have every service have prayed over him and we had asked that God would heal him as Elders the scriptures say to anoint him with oil when someone is sick right before this service our elders came and prayed over him and Anointed with oil and prayed that God would heal him of cancer and before we pray over him we want to pray for those of you today who need spiritual healing this message was for you if you're far from God if you've never accepted Jesus if you've never confessed with your mouth that he is Lord and if you never believed in your heart that he was raised from the dead today is your day of Salvation and we're going to pray for you that God would spiritually heal you and we're going to pray that God would physically heal him tomorrow as he goes for scans no coincidence that 9 months later he's sitting here and 9 months he wasn't even supposed to be [Music] here and like we said if God chooses to heal him that is I know know all of our prayers but as your family U I can tell you there'll be many in this room that will continue to pray for you you are welcomed here I thank you for being a man of Courage but a man of Honor that you kept your word that when you got sick we understood completely and we prayed for you then but for you to come back in the midst of this and going to scans tomorrow that was huge but God used you in all these services at Orange he was simoc cast in God's used you this morning and I just going to pray that he heals him so he can continue to use him in great ways so here's what we do at this church if you're comfortable with this you don't have to do it but we put our hands towards the front and we just say we're in partnership with you and with God that God would heal you so let's pray together father we thank you for this moment that is the moment you have orchestrated it is the moment you have brought us together in this day on this Sunday to pray for this man your child and before we do that God as he brought your word and as you changed and trans formed his heart he has invited others to do the same so heavenly father right now for those who have never made a choice to believe that they would confess with their mouth right now in their heart that Lord Jesus I believe you are who you say you are I ask you to save me I believe you were raised from the dead I ask you to raise me from the dead and transform me spiritually that I might live for you God I thank you for any person in this room right now that prayed that prayer father father we turn to you once again and we say your will be done in the name of Jesus the name is above every name The Only Name that heals God we come in that name and we say would you heal this man your servant would tomorrow he walk in and would he astonish the doctors when they take those scans God would those tumors be gone would the stomach cancer be released God would you do an amazing work that only you can do I thank you for his wife Michelle I thank you for his little girl I pray your protection over them and I pray as he goes tomorrow he will go in your strength and in your courage and in your peace that he is in your hands and so we ask healing and I ask that for his mom and dad and in that relationship and ask God that you would reconcile and that you would bring hope and that light switch in his mom would go back on because she would understand the saving knowledge of Jesus and I pray God that you would use him as he's your humble servant to bring that about we give you all of this we thank you for the family of God that we can come in love and we thank you for our brother here today it's in your powerful name we pray these things and everybody said amen amen see you
